Awkward Situation no. 23
The drawing is by my sister.
September 17th 2003

Well, this is very interesting. I've been stuck here for three days now, and I'm beginning to run out of food. If I look above me and to the left, I can see my backpack which I put there three hours ago when I finally realised how pointless it was to carry it. On the bright side, it's beginning to look like it's impossible to actually fall off this; on the darker side, it's beginning to look like it will be impossible to get off at all.

I think I've walked around all the faces at least once. When I first got onto it, I began marking my route in yellow chalk so that I wouldn't get lost. It turns out it's not very big, so I needn't have worried, but the chalk has given me some clue as to the shape of the thing.

For want of anything to do, I've taken to trying to balance on the edges where gravity shifts. When I'm walking the floor I'm walking on is always "downwards". It's only the other faces that ever look like they're sloping. There is, however, a point right on the edge where one half of your body is being pulled one way and one part is being pulled the other. It's very educational. I've never fallen through more than a right angle before.

Almost perfected this balancing act now. Hope someone finds me soon, or I'll have to start on the dog food.

September 18th 2003

Spent today trying to do a drawing, having quickly given up on mapping it in any meaningful way.

It reminds me a little of those mobius strips that you make with paper, except that it can't be, because all of the ends are square. I've seen a drawing of it somewhere before, come to think of it.

This is very disorientating. In the unlikely event of getting back onto the floor, I can't remember which direction the door is in. I can't even really remember which way the floor is.

I was in the Science Museum and there was a door, marked "Private". I went through it and found myself in a large dark hall, almost like a theatre, with this huge shape hovering in the middle about two metres from the ground. Curiosity got the better of me, and I walked up to it and around it, trying to see where the trick was. Couldn't see it, so I put my two hands on the surface to feel it. To my surprise, my hair fell downwards towards my hands, and I suddenly found I was doing a handstand on a surface that had been vertical only a minute ago.

September 19th 2003

Inspiration. There should be a point in the middle where the pull of all the sides should even out, if I can find it, at which point normal gravity should be able to get me; fortunately, one of the things I had in my bag was one of those extending ladders, so I set it up and leapt bodily off the top of it.

It didn't quite go as planned. I am now suspended in mid-air at exactly the point where the forces cancel out; it appears there is no gravity from the Earth here. No matter how much I struggle, I can't even get back to the shape.

"Hello? Hello? Has everyone gone home?"